On Thursday, December 13, 2013 Beyoncé Giselle Knowle-Carter with absolutely no warming, no promotion, and zero f*cks about your favorite flipped the music industry upside down and dropped her self titled visual album(5th album), Beyoncé, on iTunes #NEWRULES. After Shonda Rhimes laid me out on the floor with the winter finale of Scandal, Bey just decides to put an album on iTunes because She’s a Grown Woman, she can do whatever she wants! That is clear! I could not get to my phone fast enough to click “Buy Album” without regard to the price. #JUDGEME
Your fav could NEVER drop an album without a mumbling muthaf*ckin word, let’s just establish that! You do not have to STAN for Beyoncé, shit you don’t even have to like her, but what you WILL do is respect the fact that what she did on December 13, 2013 was f*cking genius, and only she could pull off something like that off. It is unheard of for nothing from an album to leak. I am thinking Beyoncé made everyone sign in blood and threatened to have the Creole God’s strike down anyone who dare leak anything regarding this visual album LOL. She was even nice enough to let your favs( Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Britney, etc.) drop their albums before she completely obliterated the charts. She is such a f*ckin lady!
Before I get into this review let’s talk about Target(
Bitter Ex) deciding not to carry Bey’s album *side-eye*. This has to be the dumbest decision ever! Target *taps shoulder* did you really think it would matter if you did or didn’t carry the album? Beyoncé fans were going to buy the hard copy of the album in addition to the digital album just because. But God does not like ugly, and he not too fond of pretty either, and this was clear when it was announced that millions of Target customers financial information had been compromised, let’s just say Target didn’t have a good week LOL! The coup de grâce is Beyoncé shipped her album to 7000 Starbucks Stores nationswide,many of which are located inside of Target stores, FATALITY! *Mortal Kombat voice* So Target you ain’t got no choice but carry the album! Now that we have discussed that let get on to this EPIC album!
In order to get the full effect of the album you have to watch the videos, but even without the videos the album is still great, the visuals just add to it. Beyoncé opens the album with, Pretty Hurts, which was written by Sia. This song is a beautiful song that speaks to the unattainable standards that female celebrities and women in general almost kill themselves to live up to. The message Beyoncé is sending with this song is very profound, and one that needs to be heard and repeated more often. Pretty does hurt. This was a great way to open this album, many people think Beyoncé and other celebrities rise out the bed looking the way they do, but what people fail to realize is that there is army of people helping them look the way that they do, let’s be clear she doesn’t need that much work because she is Queen Bey!
The album next flows into Ghost/Haunted, written and produced by Bey and Boots. Ghost is not an actual song on the album,we will call it an interlude. On this interlude, Bey lets us know that she is jaded with the current state of the music industry, with the line,
“All this shit I hear is boring, all this shit I do is boring, all these records boring, I don’t trust these record labels, I’m torn”.
The actual next song on the album is Haunted, on which sings about the temptations that are ever present in the crazy music industry. Crazy as it may be she has avoided the pitfalls that many of counterparts fall victims to(Thank you Matthew & Tina).
Just when you think the album can’t get any better Beyoncé gut punches us with, Drunk In Love featuring husband Jay-Z, I can not be responsible for what happens when this song comes on. The love and adoration that Bey and Jay have for each other drips off this track, first they were Crazy In Love, now they are Drunk In Love. This song is very sexual, and I love that! The sexual innuendo is just enough! Bey declares she is a grown, and she can do and say whatever the f*ck she wants at 32! Drunk In Love, is one of my favorite songs on the album. When she says,
” Ride it wit my surf board, surfboard…”
I just can’t take her!
Next up on the album is Blow, which was written and produced by Pharrell Williams, James Fauntleroy,Justin Timberlake, Timbaland,and Beyoncé. This song right here is sure to be on every woman’s lips. The song has a 70’s disco feel to it, think Donna Summer’s, but better. The thing that makes this song stand out for me is when the production switches from Pharrell to Timbaland, and then back to Pharrell ever so seamlessly. This song is reminiscent, of a time in the music industry when artists didn’t just come right out and bombard you with raunchy lyrics, they used code word to convey their meaning. An example of this from back in the day,would be Prince’s International Lover, you knew he was singing about sex, but you weren’t really offended, because it was presented in way that made it okay. Blow does this with lyrics like,
“Can you eat my skittles,That’s the sweetest in the middle,Pink that’s the flavor,Solve the riddle…I’mma lean back Don’t worry its nothing major,Make sure you clean that, That’s the only way to get the,Flavor!”
This song is another favorite of mine.
No Angel, serves as Bey’s ode to her hometown Houston. She sings in a heavenly falsetto, about her flaws as well as her lovers flaws, and how these flaws attract them to each other,the premise of this song is very simple. This video and other videos will be discussed in another blog post. I will say the video for this song puts me in the mindset of Juvenile’s video, Ha, with the imagery.
Yoncé/Partition is up next. Yoncé serves as the interlude for Partition,and Mrs. Carter is talking her sh*t on this track, with lines like,
“Yoncé all on his mouf like liqour”
The drum beat on this song is out of control, and interestingly enough it was done by Justin Timberlake. After the grittiness that is Yoncé, we are hit with Partition, which is highly sexual song, on which Bey is in your face with her sexuality, and again I love it! It is done just right! I was kind thrown off, when she said,
“He Monica Lewinsky-ed on my gown”
But I recovered quickly. It’s something about when Bey curses, that just does something to me, it humanizes her for me. The lyrics of the song paint a vivid picture for listeners. If I had never seen the video for this I could picture Bey and Jay in the back of the limo, asking the driver to roll up the partition after leaving some swanky event, because it is about to go down! This is another favorite of mine. Now lets get ready for Bey to slow it down for us.
She does this with Jealous, the premise of this song is pretty self explanatory. Bey shows that she has human emotions, while we may think that she is superhuman(SHE IS!), she gets jealous just like everyone in the world. The song is nice, not one of my favorites, but there is no skipping to be done on this album. We get even deeper with the next song.
When Bey opens Rocket with,
“Let me sit this ass…”
She pretty much had me! When I first heard this song, I instantly thought of D’Angelo’s song, Untitled. The lyrical content, the harmonies, the instrumentation, and the sexiness of this song make this song a masterpiece, and it is sure to be on your “Smooshing” iPod playlist. It just is what it is! This is another one of my favorites from the album.
Mine, which is features Aubrey AKA Drake, opens with a melodic interlude, and then flows into a insanely infectious drum beat. I wanted to break out into a tribal dance. You can tell that this is a Drake song, but Bey has a way of making this song hers. Drake and B work well together on this song, and the hook WILL BE chanted! One of my favorite lines of the song is when Aubrey says,
“All them fives need to listen when the ten is talking”
Tell your fav to receive what Aubrey said!
XO, is destined to be a crossover smash, this song is another one of my favorites on the album, the song is just fun and playful. The hook of this song is infectious, I could see this easily being a summer anthem. After slowing it down, I guess Bey decided it was time to speed it back up! Enter, Bow Down/***Flawless, Bow Down serves as the interlude for ***Flawless, it is angry, braggadocios, and aggressive all at the same time. Bey put your fav on notice with this one right here! You will respect Queen Bey! She is Helen Keller to the haters bullshit! If you or your fav took offense(
Keyshia Coleslaw) to the song, well…A hit dog will holler. As if that wasn’t enough Bow Down flows into ***Flawless, which features an excerpt, from a speech by, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, a renowned Nigerian novelist. ***Flawless serves as the ultimate women’s empowerment song.
“I woke up like dis…,”
is not to be taken literally. Beyoncé is basically telling young women to love themselves, and embrace everything them about themselves, flaws and all. This is another favorite of mine, I think I may have said that about every song so far,but oh well, you will deal!
If Bow Down/***Flawless wasn’t revolutionary enough for you, Bey, hit us with Superpower featuring Frank Ocean. I like this song, Bey and Frank work well together on this song, when I listened to the song the first time, I envisioned a Black Panther-esque scene. The lyrics could be the soundtrack to a modern day movement, with Bey leading the march. Now at this point you may want to grab some tissue, because it gets a little emotional.
Without the video the lyrics for, Heaven, will hit close to home for everyone. Anyone who has lost someone close to them, this song is for you. When I first heard the song, I thought of all the people that I have lost, especially my Granny, Alice Cora. The line,
“Heaven couldn’t wait for you”
Speaks for itself, the song, while simple, it is very touching, and therapeutic at the same time, we all must leave this earth at some point in time. I honestly think this song is about Bey’s miscarriage. I say this because like clockwork, the next song is Blue, which is a beautiful song, about Blue Ivy Carter. This song is sure to incite baby fever among Bey’s fans worldwide(
Make sure you can afford said children). I can’t speak to what having a child is like, but I imagine that nothing comes close to the love and joy a parent feels, and honestly this song has me thinking about starting a family. I keep saying I can’t afford myself, but it may be high time to get to work on a family. The addition of Blue Ivy’s vocals just take this song over the top for me. Can your fav’s offspring say they have two songs already? I’ll wait *crosses arms* Nope!
This visual album is an experience like no other. Beyoncé has done something with this project that no other LIVING artist could do. This project shows major growth and it picks up where 4, left off. You can tell from the material on this album, that Bey is at a point in her life where she is comfortable with herself, and she also getting to the point in her life where others opinions don’t matter. She is not trying to fit into the box that many want to put her in, and gone is the squeaky clean Beyoncé, she is human. This visual album is absolutely worth a listen/watch. Even if you don’t like her, for whatever unfounded reason, step outside of that and be able to recognize good music. This right here is good honest music. If you don’t listen to it, it really doesn’t matter she sold a million and counting without you! Your opinion of her is like an asshole, everyone has one, but guess what? #YOUROPINIONSOFHERDONTMATTER
Final Rating 5/5
Sidenote: The review of the videos will appear in another blog post
Disclaimer: Beyoncé slander is not allowed at www.waitwaitwhut.com(just so we are clear!)